I know I should update, but I'm not sure what. I feel depressed and I have no reason to be. I hate it when I get like this. Once I get I had way to high expectations for christmas and once again I was disappointed. Technically, on the surface it was good. It was quiet and peaceful, -IT WAS WHITE!- I didn't have trun in the snow, and the kids were totally happy. For some reason, I can't help but feel lonely and bored. I'm 22, and O feel ike life should be more exciting than this. I have everything a person that is 35 strives for to be happy. But when I, that old, then what am I going to want. Whats going to make me happy and have someothing to look forward to? What about now? I want to feel alive, and enjoy life, I want to run with my youth before I lose it...and yet I just watch it slip away,

until one day it will be gone. thought like these, and I can't breath next -- previous DISCLAIMER